Lying on the floor yesterday, in a mild doze, I was struck by a thought. It was about oranges. This isn't unusual. There are far worse things to think about! The thought was approximately thus: If every carton of orange juice is made from between 30 and 50 oranges, then if we stopped drinking orange juice there would be thousands if not millions of oranges available for everyone to eat in the world every year. This seems very strange. Oranges are being used unwisely.
The oranges are only the tip of the iceberg, or the smallest bay in the orange juice ocean. Imagine all the beef that gets converted into burgers, via the most profoundly horrible methodology that you absolutely should not look up, just being frozen as steaks or sold as trimmings for sandwiches or roast dinners. Then do the same for all the turkey and chicken, and the masses of pork that gets converted into barely edible sausages and frozen things. It's a mind boggling amount of food, and all of it effectively a waste and misleading as we end up eating more of what they do make very unwisely.
It is a naive point of view, I know, but maybe it should be said that the food industry is a ridiculous packing plant of lies, perverting the original intent of fridges and freezers for more than a century now. Those invaluable devices were meant for us to manage our own food preparation and storage better and reduce waste. Instead, for the most part and non-literally, we can't fit the second half of today's cottage pie in as it's already filled to the brim with burgers or turkey cheese fried things (name withheld for lack of publicity) or piles and piles of potato waffles, and several things with way too much sugar. It's all down to lies and gullibility and convenience.
In Dorothy L Sayers' 'Murder Must Advertise', Lord Peter Wimsey goes undercover at an advertising firm to investigate a death, which is really all just a cover for Sayers to vent her frustration with that industry she used to work in, and vent she does. The lies and manipulations are astounding, and not just in food. Gullible people are led to believe in the most ridiculous needs for things, and because they're gullible or just plain stupid - I can not deny the existence of stupid people, only hope I am not one of them while thinking the reverse - they enter into this bizarre chain of beliefs that cycles endlessly and which is completely ridiculous in actuality, and which has no opposition! No-one argues the opposite of convenience because they know it won't go well, but they really should.
"Drink orange juice, it's packed with vitamin C!"
"No, eat an orange, it's got all you need for a day."
"You must have this new iphone 6, it can do even more of the things you do already!"
"Go sit under a tree and talk to your friends. It's calm and relaxing."
"Our burgers are now 100% beef!"
"Wait, then what were you selling me before? What?! Infamy! I no longer trust you, creeps."
"Hello, we're selling these fine leather jackets."
"Actually, fine, no problem. Come in!"
'New and improved' is a particular favourite of mine, it being in many cases a tacit confession of guilt that were selling something worse before, and hoping no-one will notice that now. I might be the only to get the joke though. Also, whenever you see a picture of the Milky Way, it's actually not our galaxy but Andromeda. We can't get a picture of the Milky Way as we're inside it, but I digress!
There's no real answer of course, except to educate people in the idea that sometimes businesses lie to us to sell us things, and that they do it systematically and with great experience. Yes, at first thought the purchase of a quadlangular may have seemed like a good idea, but you will need to get the patent fuel pellets and replace the laser crystals every eighteen months, and then be tempted with the mark two quadlangular (the 'Duo'!), which will vibrate twice as quickly, but fall apart 20% more quickly on average. Sigh, it's all lies. Cynicism, thou art on holiday far too often when it comes to buying things!
In retrospect, I suppose my anger was mainly at the traps of life in this strange materialistic world, as I sit hypocritically buried under DVDs and novels, and brood over the loss of my boomerang in the cricket nets at the park this afternoon. What a world!
O.
PS I do have quadlangulars for sale at a bargain price now! Just bear in mind you will need a medical permission and references from your local notary before sale is completed. Also, some garlic, to combat the 'verdant aroma'.
PPS While everyone was digging into the systematic exposure of tobacco companies in the last century, it's a shame they didn't kick over the confectionary and fast food firms at the same time. It might have saved the health services billions!
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